Twenty-somethings

iGen: Understanding the Next Generation
Jean Twenge, iGen: Why Today's Super-Connected Kids Are Growing Up Less Rebellious, More Tolerant, Less Happy--and Completely Unprepared for Adulthood* (*and What That Means for the Rest of Us) (New York: Atria Books, 2017) Review by Hal Young Cultural changes tend to be gradual, incremental things, says Jean Twenge, a professor of psychology who studies generational…
Staying Pure in Engagement
Someone recently asked, Now that we're engaged, it's increasingly hard to stay pure. I mean, we'll be married soon, right? I know it's wrong, but it doesn't seem as big a deal now that it's just a matter of weeks or months. Can you help us think about this the right way? We've been there. The…
Transitioning to Spiritual Adulthood
This one is for the teens and twenties. It's hard to write, too. When you're young and healthy, you don't really think about dying. It just seems remote. But two days ago, our sons lost a friend they'd known for years from church and Christian activities. Wilson Brant was just 26 when a car accident…
When You’re Worried Your Son is Going to Go Too Far
A mom asked, We did the hard press for courtship/dating with a purpose. And it worked - sorta. My son is head over heels for his girlfriend. Sex is coming. It just is. They still say they want to wait. They aren't rebelling by going to her apartment, but he's in a battle between his hormones/desires and…
When You Find That on Your Husband’s Phone
It's the conference season, so we're all over the place speaking and talking to people. It's an honor to hear their stories and to be invited into their lives. It's also heartbreaking, sometimes. We think the hardest part is talking to those whose marriages are in trouble. The grief is palpable. They look broken, injured,…
When Should You Get Your Kids Their Driver’s License?
When we were teenagers, we couldn't wait to get our driver's license. It was a step toward adulthood, and we were eager to have the independence that driving represented. All our friends felt the same way, and our parents encouraged it. Recently, though, we've been hearing something which frankly surprised us. We were listening to…
A Question About Fifty Shades of Grey
This morning a friend asked, "Do you think I should watch Fifty Shades of Grey with my teen and talk about it?"  We're not as strict on media as some are. We think there's some value in watching things you don't agree with and analyzing and discussing them with your teens. Sometimes, though, there's more…
Launching Family Business Greenhouse
People often ask us how they can start a family business like we did. The problem is that they need to start a family business like only they can!   One day we were visiting with some dear friends and talking about the need to help families who want the freedom and flexibility both our families…
What in the World is Courtship?
Nearly thirty years ago, we had what was in many ways an unusual relationship compared to many of our friends. For us, it grew rather naturally from a friendship between two people who were rather analytical about things—even affairs of the heart. But we’re getting ahead of our story. When it comes to marriage or…